


when tomorrow comes.

by lupupper



Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Blood, Hyunjin is briefly alluded to at the start, LET ME KNOW IF YOU NEED ME TO TAG ANYTHING ELSE OR CHANGE THE RATING, LMAO, M/M, Mentioned violence, Minor Character Death, i'm sleepy, inspiration from district 9 and go go ghost ship, not even good angst, some brief language, there be blood, this is like all angst, this is what happens when i haven't slept and want to use written kitten again, two pretty heckin different songs tbh
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-28
Updated: 2018-03-28
Packaged: 2019-04-14 01:04:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,598
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14124786
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lupupper/pseuds/lupupper
Summary: Jisung’s hold is barely even there, yet it makes him feel secure. Chan wants to draw himself closer to that lovely warmth and stay there, where he can bask in this feeling of safety. There’s nothing wrong with that. He knows he can be happy if he stays right here.





	when tomorrow comes.

As he’s slumped on the floor, back against cold brick, he’s only vaguely aware of the carnage still raging on. His friends that are still fighting and those that have been strewn in a bloody mess across the concrete. He catches sight of long legs beaten into awful angles and full lips dripping blood somewhere ahead of him. Out of the corner of his eye he spots freckles and dirty blonde locks, lying in a pool of red. The sight of that oh so familiar kid’s skull all caved in would’ve made him retch if he wasn’t dangerously close to passing out.

There’s a small thump next to him as someone joins him against the wall, and then he’s being pulled in to rest against someone’s warm chest. Under the stench of iron from all around them, he can smell something faintly sweet, and in an instant he knows exactly who came to him, so Chan lets the hands that took hold of him cradle his pounding head without protest. He wonders if he’s bleeding too. Probably, his head hit the wall pretty fucking hard. He wants to apologise for getting blood on the shirt his face is currently buried into, but a sickening gut feeling and the trembling of the thin arms around him, weak breathy pants over his head that barely move strands of his hair, tell him that the likely large gash in his scalp isn’t the only thing that’s staining those white clothes.

Jisung’s hold is barely even there, yet it makes him feel secure. Chan wants to draw himself closer to that lovely warmth and stay there, where he can bask in this feeling of safety. There’s nothing wrong with that. He knows he can be happy if he stays right here.

Through the haze of his sanctuary and the chaos ensuing around them, he can hear something. Jisung is trying to get his attention. _He wants to tell me something._ He forces his dizzy mind to concentrate on what the younger has to say. Because it’s Jisung and, to Chan, anything he wants to say is important enough to need his full attention. Whether it was to confess how Chan makes his heart skip, a new idea towards the movement, or something as simple and dumb as his opinion on certain sandwich fillings, everything out of Jisung’s mouth was deserving of his time.

“You know you can’t carry on like this, don’t you hyung?”

So Chan’s surprised by the sudden question. It’s nothing like Jisung has ever asked him before and catches him off guard. He draws the strength needed to raise his head enough so he can look the younger boy in the eye, and what he sees gazing back at him throws him through another huge loop. Jisung seems defeated, an odd thing to see on such an optimistic kid. The sorrowful look in his eyes causes dread to settle heavy in Chan’s heart, although he doesn’t understand why.

_What do you mean?_

Jisung exhales a sigh and his eyes slide shut. It seems as though he can tell what Chan wants to say even if he can’t quite verbalise it, as he continues to speak. “Listen, I know it’s easy, but you can’t just stay here forever. You have the power to get out.”

_Yes, Sungie, I know! That’s why we’re fighting, right? So we can get out of this bullshit system. We’re still alive, we can get out of this together, me and you._

“No, no hyung. You know what I mean. You need to go and I can’t follow.”

_No, I don’t. I don’t know what you mean, I don’t understand, what do you mean? Of course you can follow me, you always do! I don’t like this Jisung, I don’t want to understand. Please look at me._

“You can see it right, in the people? Your followers and opposition alike are slaughtering each other, yet it’s all meaningless. Trust me.” Jisung turns his head to gaze out over the crowd of people, their cries of war and rebellion sounding muted. _What’s meaningless? Of course I trust you. Look at me._ Jisung does. His sad eyes focus back on Chan before he opens his mouth again, “The longer you stay here and the more you try to fight it, that pull telling you to go, the closer this world comes to tearing itself apart. You know full well that you need to leave, now. For... For your own good.”

_I can’t. Jisung this isn’t funny, stop this now. Hyung needs you to stop. I love you. I can’t._

He’s smiling, his pretty pretty smile. Chan doesn’t know how he can smile about this.

“You know you can, hyung, it’ll all be okay once you go. You have to be strong for me.”

 _No, Jisung, please._ Chan used to like referring to the metaphorical gears in his mind when he had brilliant ideas, but for once they’re faltering. They’re not working like the well-oiled machine they normally are. Spinning too slow and turning too clunkily to keep him on a coherent train of thought. It’s making him panic, he doesn’t know what to do. _I can’t leave you here. I can’t leave you alone. My angel, I love you so much, please don’t let go of me. Let me stay here with you, Sungie. Wouldn’t that be nice? Wouldn’t you like that? I would. Why do you want me to leave you? We can stay here. Safe, just like this._

The face he’s been staring at is blurring, so is the world around him. Chan thinks maybe that's because of the tears dripping down his cheeks, but when careful hands cup his face and wipe them away, everything remains blurry. His head is getting lighter and he can’t focus and he can feel himself slipping away, but the one thing he knows is that he doesn’t want this. He doesn’t want this to end, it can’t end, all he wants is to stay right here, in this moment, with Jisung, his Jisungie, _Jisung, pleasepleaseplease don’t let me go-_

The younger pulls him closer with the smallest tug and Chan falls readily into him, grips onto his shirt with every ounce of strength he can manage. This proves to be in vain as the energy continues to seep from his body. There’s a sniffle above him and then a gentle pressure on his forehead that makes his skin tingle with warmth. He takes a few heartbeats until he can register it as a kiss.

Jisung's saying goodbye.

His constant internal mantra of _don’t want to go, don’t want to leave you_ has devolved into aimless pleading as his rationality fails and his fingers lose their hold on damp, reddened fabric. He can’t keep it together. The cries are getting louder around him - too loud _too much_ \- and the darkness at the edges of his vision is creeping in more until he’s swallowed by the inky blackness once again.

“It’s time to wake up.”

And everything stops.

.

When Chan opens his eyes it's with a struggle. They feel crusty and gross and, in short, just like they don't want to open. He can hear a steady beeping off to one side. There’s no yelling, no iron in the air. _Huh. Odd things to observe, Bang_.

When he actually does manage to pry his eyes open, what he can see is almost entirely taken up by a foggy silhouette looming over him, and for a moment his heart jumps into his throat. Though his head is swimming, he wills himself concentrate, blinking to clear his sight as quickly as he can. Maybe he’s hoping for something. The person eventually comes into focus and he finds himself looking up into familiar wide eyes on a freckled face, a mess of dark brown hair, and a loud mouth spewing strings of mindless word vomit.

_Hang on, dark brown...?_

“Chris? Oh wow, you’re actually awake! Okay now what do I do, do I go get a nurse? Do you need a nurse? Maybe I should just go get the doctor, or will the nurse lady get the doctor if I get her? Who's easier to call for? Wait, is your nurse even a woman? That was kinda rude of me to assume right, men can be nurses too- oh my god not the time, I’ll just go get mum, she’ll know what to do!”

The boy dashes off and Chan is still lying there under white sheets, disoriented and confused as things slowly start to come back to him.

Felix had always had dark hair, hadn’t he? Yeah, why had he been so surprised by that? And aside from that, he loved his cousin dearly, they were like brothers after all, he should be ecstatic that he was seeing Felix when he woke up. So why, when he saw Felix's relieved and concerned face peering down at him, did Chan feel a pang of emptiness in his heart? Had he been expecting to see someone else?

He tried to think of anything that could have caused this, but the more he thinks the more his head aches. There’s a memory of a scent faintly sweet in the far reaches of his mind, a name on the tip of his tongue, the echo of a voice ringing in his ear that makes the chasm in his chest crumble further open. He yearns for a warmth that he doesn’t know, but an unsettling chill runs through his body instead.

He’s awake and he’s so, very cold.

**Author's Note:**

> me: i wanna write a soft chansung merman au!!  
> inner me: okay but hear me out. p a i n.
> 
> anyway, taking insp from a stray kids song and a kenshi yonezu song and grabbing a title from a lyric of a les mis song for the luls, we're just drawing a little from everything today aren't we.
> 
> i'm gonna be entirely honest with you here it's like gone nine in the morning and i haven't slept all night idk what in the fresh hell this is. i had an idea for a proper oneshot that was kinda long but then i was like fUCK IT I WANNA WRITE SOMETHING NOW and also wanted to use written kitten again it's sO CUTE, so this happened. i might take this down after i've eventually fallen asleep and woken up again because ew?? or like, if i actually want to put it into a longer oneshot kyaaa who knows. let me know about any mistakes i might need to fix aight? i'm 98% sure if i read through this another time before i get food my brain will melt outta my ears. okay that's enough for this ramble of a note, i'm out nerds! buh-byeeeee~


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